For those who are living with an abusive partner, lockdown has provided greater opportunity for their abuser to exert even more control. As I said in a previous blog, we can’t blame lockdown as being the cause of any sort of abuse but it has provided the ideal context for abuse to continue and grow.
We know, from research, that many abusers seek to isolate their partners from family and friends, as by doing so they can feel more in control. When there is no input from third parties the abused partner is likely to be more dependent on their abuser for approval and authorisation. Most maltreated partners are left with no self-worth and self-confidence and lack any sort of belief that they have any power to influence or change their circumstances. For them to regain any sense of control over their environment it is essential that those who are suffering abuse can have access to people who understand their position, who can endorse and validate them and maybe offer some advice on steps they might take to alter their circumstances.
I felt very reassured to discover that Boots Pharmacies are offering the opportunity to those individuals who are experiencing abuse from a partner, to make contact with Domestic Abuse agencies who can offer them support. Boots have dedicated a room in their Pharmacy Department that individuals can use as a safe space to make a call to a variety of organisations who may be able to help them. Boots have recognised that means of ‘escaping’ the abuse during this period of lockdown have been severely minimised and phone calls to ask for help can be very difficult when an abusive partner is always around. The more places offering the facility for individuals to speak freely about their experience of being mistreated and abused by a partner, the more likely it is that we can halt some people’s suffering and they can go on to make choices about their future, protecting themselves and their children.
Brethertons LLP provides such a service, where those who are concerned about their partner’s behaviour towards them can speak to a member of the Family Team who will understand the nature of all the different kinds of abuse and who can offer support in a confidential, non-judgemental way. Both legal advice and emotional support can be offered to those who make contact with the experienced team and know they will be offered both empathy and understanding. At Brethertons there is complete acceptance that both males and females can become the prey of abusers and recognition is given to how difficult that first disclosure can be and it will be dealt with extremely sensitively.
If you are worried that you might be experiencing abuse and want to seek advice and reassurance, please do make that first phone call, the Family Team at Brethertons can be contacted on 01788 579579.
If you feel you need some emotional support before you do that or are unsure about any of the elements of an abusive relationship then please do email me; elizabethheadley@brethertons.co.uk. I have over twenty years of experience of working as a relationship therapist and would be more than happy to offer my support if you feel it might be helpful.